Thursday, January 26, 2012

My Abusive Boyfriend: Knitting

Knitting is like an abusive boyfriend. I get so excited to see it, and it kicks me in the you-know-what. I love it and it knocks me down. I try to improve it and it tortures me. And after all this abusive, I keep coming back.

Last night, I was on a roll with the fingerless gloves. I was making good time and making no mistakes. Then I actually looked at the pattern....and my knitting. I'd knitted too far! I had to take out two rows to get in line with the pattern. Okay, deep breath. You can do this.

And I do. I take out two rows, slowly but surely. I try not to panic when a stitch drops; I just grab the crochet hook and get it back on the needle. Then I come to the section where I've been adding making stitches. And it all goes wrong. Suddenly stitches that should stay stitches are disappearing. What the heck?! I didn't add them on this row so whey are they coming apart on this row?!

I couldn't fix it. I'll have to wait until a Knit Night with my super-smart knitting buddy.

I hate that I can't fix these crazy mistakes by myself. I can fix most things but not the crazy things. I hate that something everyone says is relaxing is usually very stressful for me. I hate that I look forward to knitting SO much and so often come away completely dejected. And I hate that it makes me feel dumb; I can't think myself out of most knitting mistakes.

So my knitting confidence is rock bottom. I guess that's nothing new. But it would be good to feel like I'm doing something right every once in a while.


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